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Rainbow 🌈 baby

Behind every rainbow 🌈 baby

There is one hell of a journey

No one understands this unless they have been through this

As a woman who lost her first baby because of my complications after losing my waters

When myself and my partner discussed having a baby

He wasn't really keen as didn't want us to go through losing an other baby

The only way he agreed to try again was that I had to have a pregnancy plan.

I spoke with a few consultants, and decided to go with the one who offered me a cervical stitch and regular lab testing of samples.

Despite the risks to this procedure

I felt it was the right option for me

A week or so after my stitch I was in A & E & I had to convince the nurse to lab test my urine.

The results of the dipstick were clear but my lab results, equal ecoli

The emotional rollercoaster of this pregnancy was in a word worrying, scary

Any pain, any lack of movements I was at the hospital

When they took my stitch out at 36 weeks, I just wanted my baby girl to be born.

She kept me waiting for a few more weeks.

At that point I hadn't even brought a pram or car seat

As I was so anxious in case my waters broke and I would end up losing another baby

I was petrified

I actually felt my pregnancy had been stolen with my anxiety

I ended up requesting to be induce as my anxiety was not great.

Her birth started off great and I was in the water pool, as so wanted a water birth

However my luck wasn't in, as after they broke my waters, in which there was a room fall of water

My baby heart rate went rapidly down

I had to have IV antibiotics as I had been confirmed group b strep

It went rapidly fast

She was born by emergency c section, nearly a general

It felt surreal & there is a part of me, that was overwhelmed

How she looked like her older sister

We talk about our rainbow babies

But we forget to talk about us mothers and how difficult that pregnancy after loss is

I hope in the future that perinatal nurses are introduced to mums who lose their babies & when they are lucky enough to be able to bring this special baby into the World

It's one hell of a journey

Hope after the storm


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